Instructor's Commentary
Argumentative writing is an essential component of academic work because it establishes contextual knowledge, clarifies the significance of a study, and demonstrates the “so-whatness” of research. In other words, the ability to construct a clear, well-supported argument forms the foundation of credible academic discourse. Yet many students fall short when their arguments rely on unfocused claims, overly descriptive examples, or insufficient engagement with opposing viewpoints, resulting in arguments that feel one-sided or unpersuasive.
This month, we highlight a student essay from the Fundamentals of English Writing course that demonstrates how these challenges can be effectively addressed by incorporating three key elements — a clear and precise thesis, logically organized reasoning grounded in compelling evidence, and thoughtful engagement with counterarguments. The essay explores whether social media enhances or limits cultural diversity, and the writer presents a focused, well-supported position.
The student establishes a precise and arguable position with a clear thesis (“social media predominantly functions as a catalyst for enhancing cultural diversity globally”) and outlines three major lines of reasoning that structure the entire essay. Each reason is supported with concrete, research-based examples. For instance, the discussion of “Blueprint Supreme” illustrates how viral trends allow for culturally distinct reinterpretations, while the example of multilingual content creator Jenny demonstrates how social media fosters linguistic preservation and cultural exchange. Equally important, the student engages counterarguments with caution and balance, acknowledging concerns about cultural homogenization and responding with compelling evidence: Indigenous communities documenting traditional ceremonies, LGBTQIA+ creators increasing visibility, and advocacy groups mobilizing support for minority voices. These examples illustrate how the student not only recognizes legitimate concerns but responds with relevant counter-evidence and balanced analysis.
Finally, the essay concludes with a thoughtful reflection on media literacy and inclusive algorithm design, reinforcing both the depth of the writer's critical engagement and the broader implications of social media's cultural impact. Rather than taking digital content at face value, the student encourages a more reflective and informed perspective.
The Revised Essay
Does Social Media Enhance Cultrual Diversity?
Cultural diversity encompasses the multiple ways in which cultures are expressed, shared, and transmitted within and between societies, as reflected in the richness of cultural heritage and artistic creation across various forms, methods, and technologies (UNESCO, 2023). Recently, this conception of cultural diversity has been challenged by the rapid development of global social media platforms such as X, TikTok, and Instagram. Critics argue that algorithm-driven content curation may lead to cultural homogenization, where dominant trends overshadow local traditions and diminish cultural uniqueness (Balogun & Aruoture, 2024). Despite these concerns, I argue that social media predominantly functions as a catalyst for enhancing cultural diversity globally through disseminating local traditions, empowering marginalized groups, and encouraging cross-cultural dialogue.
One major concern is that social media encourages younger generations to pursue globally unified behaviors, values, and fashion, influenced by viral trends (Balogun & Aruoture, 2024). Yet these trends are often localized and adapted to fit specific cultural contexts and personal styles, resulting in diverse interpretations of the same content. When a song goes viral, content creators frequently cover and reinterpret it by adding their own performance styles, rhythms, and expressions, producing distinct cultural renditions. For example, the popular Chinese song “Blueprint Supreme” inspired BuQi dance crew to create original choreography that has attracted 6.61 million views (Buquicriew, 2025). Three weeks later, an Indigenous content creator, JunTing, rewrote the lyrics using elements of the Amis language to narrate his personal life story within his tribe (Jung Ting, 2025). This transformation demonstrates how viral content can serve as a platform for local voices and cultural expression. Moreover, social media facilitates the global dissemination of local languages, customs, cuisines, and arts, allowing diverse cultures to reach and influence international audiences. For instance, Jenny, a Taiwanese content creator living in Japan, teaches Japanese grammar with Mandarin explanations on Instagram and has attracted around 80,000 followers (Jenny, 2025). Her content not only promotes language learning but also helps preserve linguistic diversity. She also shares insights into Japanese customs, such as table manners and etiquette, offering followers a window into unique cultural practices.
Another critique centers on the fear that social media reinforces cultural uniformity, particularly favoring dominant cultures such as Han Chinese or heterosexual norms in Taiwan. In reality, social media amplifies underrepresented voices, which contributes to a more inclusive cultural landscape. Indigenous communities in Taiwan, for example, utilize social media such as Instagram to document traditional wedding ceremonies and educate others about their history and practices (Mulie, 2023; Wu, 2025; Greenphoto, 2024). Similarly, drag performance, an expressive art form that allows LGBTQIA+ individuals to display diverse gender expression, has also gained visibility through social media. Drag performer Nymphia Wind shared a boba-themed costume on Instagram to express his pride in both his Asian and gender-minority identities, garnering 195,000 likes and nearly 1,000 comments from users around the world (Nymphia, 2025). These examples demonstrate how social media not only diversifies cultural content but also amplifies marginalized voices. Therefore, minority communities benefit from the ability to represent themselves authentically, challenging dominant cultural norms and enriching the broader cultural landscape.
Some have argued that the superficial engagement on social media might create social stigma and fuel discrimination. However, with proper media literacy skills, users can foster meaningful cross-cultural conversations on social media. Through interactive features such as polls and comment sections, users can ask questions, request translations, and engage in discussions that deepen cultural understanding. In the case of the Indigenous wedding ritual known as “escaping bride,” users asked about the cultural significance and consequences if the groom failed to catch the bride (Wu, 2025). Both the content creator and other users responded to the comments to start a discussion on the ceremony's cultural narrative. Such interactions show that when users engage content critically and with openness, social media enables immediate clarification of misconceptions and enhances cultural understanding.
Social media platforms, while not without challenges, predominantly enhance cultural diversity by exposing users to a variety of local traditions, empowering marginalized voices, and facilitating cross-cultural communication. Yet the positive potential of these platforms depends greatly on how both users and designers approach them. It is crucial to strengthen users' media literacy with the ability to help them critically identify cultural biases and engage in meaningful cultural exchange respectfully. At the same time, platform developers should design inclusive algorithms that promote diverse cultural representation rather than amplifying dominant norms. By combining user-oriented media literacy with structural improvements in platform governance, social media can better fulfill its potential to promote cultural diversity and reduce inequalities in an increasingly interconnected world.
Inside the Revision Process
The polished essay above is the result of careful revision. Below, we share six representative moments from Monica's drafting process - each illustrating a writing principle that any student writer can apply.
✓ Spotlight 1: Match Transition Strength to the Logical Turn
Before:
“However, this conception of cultural diversity has been challenged by the rapid development of global social media platforms...”
After:
“Recently, this conception of cultural diversity has been challenged by the rapid development of global social media platforms...”
Why it matters: However signals a sharp reversal, but here, the writer is simply introducing a new development, not overturning the previous sentence. As Dr. Yeh pointed out, reserve However for moments of strong contrast; for gentler pivots, milder transitions like Recently, Yet, or In recent years fit better. Always check that your transition word matches the strength of the logical turn, not just its direction.
✓ Spotlight 2: Consolidate Repetitive Examples; Choose One That Reinforces Your Thesis
Before:
“For example, in the viral K-pop dance trend 'Mantra dance challenge,' participants perform the same choreography but each adds their own flavor through rhythm, facial expressions, and power control variation (Kitty, 2024; 夏菈Lala, 2024). Some dancers even create their own choreography with original movements, giving totally different interpretation of the song (아이키, 2024; 윤인정, 2024).”
After:
“When a song goes viral, content creators frequently cover and reinterpret it by adding their own performance styles, rhythms, and expressions, producing distinct cultural renditions. For example, the popular Chinese song 'Blueprint Supreme' inspired BuQi dance crew to create original choreography that has attracted 6.61 million views (Buquicriew, 2025). Three weeks later, an Indigenous content creator, JunTing, rewrote the lyrics using elements of the Amis language to narrate his personal life story within his tribe (Jung Ting, 2025). This transformation demonstrates how viral content can serve as a platform for local voices and cultural expression.”
Why it matters: Four citations stacked together read like a literature review, not an argument. Acting on Dr. Yeh's feedback, Monica compressed the repetitive evidence into one clear claim, then anchored it with one vivid case. Even better, the replacement example — an Indigenous Amis-language reinterpretation — does far more to support a “cultural diversity” claim than a list of mainstream K-pop dancers ever could.
✓ Spotlight 3: Replace Abstract Claims with Concrete Cases
Before:
“Likewise, gender minorities benefit from the ability to represent themselves authentically, rather than relying on narratives controlled by centralized authorities (Hammack & Manago, 2025).”
After:
“Drag performer Nymphia Wind shared a boba-themed costume on Instagram to express his pride in both his Asian and gender-minority identities, garnering 195,000 likes and nearly 1,000 comments from users around the world (Nymphia, 2025).”
Why it matters: As Dr. Yeh emphasized, a citation alone does not equal evidence. Phrases like “centralized authorities” or “authentic representation” only become persuasive when grounded in a real person, platform, and outcome. Showing readers who did what, where, and with what response is where argumentative power lives.
✓ Spotlight 4: Specify the Platform; Make Examples Tangible
Before:
“Indigenous communities in Taiwan, for example, utilize social media to document traditional wedding ceremonies and educate others about their history and practices.”
After:
“Indigenous communities in Taiwan, for example, utilize social media such as Instagram to document traditional wedding ceremonies and educate others about their history and practices.”
Why it matters: “Social media” is a vague umbrella. As Dr. Yeh suggested, naming the actual platform — Instagram, TikTok, X — instantly grounds the example in a real space readers can picture. Small specificity adjustments like this accumulate into a much more credible argument.
✓ Spotlight 5: Close Each Paragraph in Your Own Voice
Before: (paragraph ends with the Nymphia Wind example and a string of citations.)
After:
“These examples demonstrate how social media not only diversifies cultural content but also amplifies marginalized voices. Therefore, minority communities benefit from the ability to represent themselves authentically, challenging dominant cultural norms and enriching the broader cultural landscape.”
Why it matters: Every body paragraph should end with a sentence that ties the evidence back to your thesis. Dr. Yeh reminded Monica that without it, readers are left holding the examples but unsure what to do with them. A strong closing sentence is the writer's chance to say: here is why this evidence matters.
✓ Spotlight 6: Expand a Vague Conclusion into Concrete Recommendations
Before:
“As social media continues to shape global interactions, it is imperative to cultivate media literacy and implement inclusive algorithms to harness its potential in promoting cultural diversity and reducing inequalities.”
After:
“Yet the positive potential of these platforms depends greatly on how both users and designers approach them. It is crucial to strengthen users' media literacy… At the same time, platform developers should design inclusive algorithms that promote diverse cultural representation rather than amplifying dominant norms.”
Why it matters: A conclusion that merely restates the thesis in one broad sentence leaves readers with nothing new. Following Dr. Yeh's advice, Monica split her recommendations into two concrete dimensions — what users should do (develop critical media literacy) and what platform designers should do (build inclusive algorithms), giving each enough space to feel actionable. A strong conclusion not just echoes the introduction but also extends the argument forward.
Takeaway for student writers:
Revision is not about polishing surface errors — it is about sharpening logic, grounding claims, and giving every paragraph a clear job. Try reading your own draft with these six questions in mind. You may be surprised how much stronger your argument becomes.